Thank you, sailorusagi for the movie - it came in the mail today!

OMGYAYSQUEE!!!1!!!

I can't wait to watch it. :-)

Last bit on this topic...but I've learned interesting things today! Apparently, freeko is an "AIDS-ridden homo" and I'm a fat, ugly, stupid whore.

I find it amusing that people who don't even know me can tell me things about myself and my friends that we ourselves didn't even know.

And in the words of Forrest Gump, that's all I have to say about that.

I've grown pretty attached to you guys. When I read my friends list,I'm always impressed by how intelligent and kind you people are as a group. I want you guys to know each other.

So break out the cookies and the sparkling cider. It's time to say hello! Meet, greet,and friend each other! Introduce yourself and friend others like crazy.You won't find a single bad apple in this barrel of laughs. If youhaven't friended me yet, or want to send over someone new, now's thetime. Let's have a party before the holiday festivities overwhelm us!

I'll clean up all the cookie crumbs later. =) And incidentally? The napkins are over there. There. By the snickerdoodles.

Okay, so comment with an intro so that you can "meet" my friends and maybe some of you will like each other and you know, be friends.

This is public, just in case any of you want to send your friends over here! :)

I am very proud of the way that I look. I'm not a stick by any means, I am a voluptuous, curvy woman with plenty of meat on my bones. I love my squishy belly, my ample rear end, my great breasts. I have no complaints or apologies towards how I look. This is me, and I personally could care less if you like it or not, because I know that there are plenty of other people out there who do.

Now granted, I have not always been comfortable with my weight. After my ex-husband went to prison in July of 2003, I gained twenty pounds after finding solace with Chinese food from the deli at Safeway and pints of Ben & Jerry's. I was depressed and I didn't want to leave the house. It didn't help that I was subsisting on a diet of greasy Hamburger Helper, completely unhealthy amounts of fast food (and we're not talking salads, either), Hungry Man salisbury steak TV dinners, fried chicken from the deli down the street and grilled cheese sandwiches on Wonder bread with Velveeta, not grilled so much as fried in sticks of Imperial margarine.

And when I was married, my diet was relatively close to the same. My ex-husband would make biscuits and gravy, slather the biscuits with margarine and then slather gravy over the top of it. Fried spam & velveeta sandwiches. He would sit in front of the television eating deep-fried burritos covered with sour cream and chili. Dip hot dogs into a pile of mayonnaise. Brown rice? Never heard of it. Baked potato chips as opposed to fried? An abomination. Lettuce besides iceburg in a salad? My mom doesn't eat that way, so why should I?

It wasn't until November of 2003 when I was fully able to recognize that I needed to do something about my health. My best friend and I were walking back to my house from hers when a man in an olive drab military-style parka with the hood up ran past me and stole my purse. I tried to chase him as he continued running, but I felt like I was going to die. Ami, in better shape than I was at the time, tore off down the street after him, but was unable to catch him. I, on the other hand, stood on the sidewalk screaming profanities and crying, feeling like my heart was about to explode from inside my chest. I wasn't unhappy with my weight, but my health was in jeopardy. I thought about my grandfather, who had already had two heart attacks and one open-heart surgery in the past twenty-five years.

Not long after that, I was getting some r & r at my mom and dad's house, wearing a pair of jeans that I loved with big buckles on the upper thigh and a split leg. I was laying on my old daybed on my side, facing the wall, when my father comes in before leaving for work, and smacks my ass and kind of jiggles it. "You've got to shake off some of this poundage," he says, with his habit to make up words. "Because you know, you were such a solid little gal when you were in high school...and you looked super good back then, you know."

I have lost probably close to fifty pounds since that day. I didn't lose weight because my father told me that I had a big ass. In fact, he referred to it as a "ghetto booty" more than once, and I shot back with, "Yes, Jennifer Lopez has this same ass, and she's famous for it." I didn't lose weight because I was feeling unattractive. I didn't lose weight because I was a "fat American woman" as close-minded idiots like americwomensux would say, I lost weight to improve my health and that's all there is to it. And again, I wasn't even trying to lose weight in the first place - I just wanted to be healthier.

So you know what? You can come here, you can take my photos, you can post them in LJ Flame Cup you can make fun of me and call me a fat, ugly American bitch, but you know what? Inner beauty is what shines the brightest, and no matter what size you are, what is sexiest is when you're comfortable in your own skin. Which is why I believe that some of the sexiest women out there are people like seemlesswaters, whose confidence shines through her in everything she does, like the_shit_i_know, who is one of the most beautiful women I have ever met both inside and out.
Beauty is being comfortable with who you are and loving yourself for your flaws and your imperfections as well as your wonderful qualities.

And the only thing that is truly ugly is the hatred that close-minded, hate-filled, ignorant, idiotic people like you feel towards those that don't conform to your certain pre-set mold of what's beautiful. What do I think is sexy?
this is.

Have a nice day.

Sincerely,
a fat, happy, sassy American bitch.

PS - I have no problem with who I am. At 185 lbs, I'm perfect happy with myself. And no stupid comments about "mooooving sideways through doors" or the eternally clever "cow" statement are going to make me change my stance. And if that's truthfully the best you can do, I find that quite sad.

due to personal circumstances, I cut a few people. Please let me assure you that it's nothing personal, first of all.

If you believe that you were cut unfairly, please go ahead & let me know and I will add you back.

No hard feelings.

- Corrie

If there is anything - at all - that you want to know about me, here s your chance to ask. Nothing is off-limits here, so ask away. I will do my best to answer each & every question honestly and clearly.

Looking forward to what you all have to say!

- Corrie

To paraphrase Ariel Truax (Ann-Margret) in "Grumpy Old Men", the things we regret the most are the risks that we don't take.

And I have taken many more risks in the past year than I have in my entire life.

I left a house where I was used as nothing more than a meal ticket.

I left a man in prison for a very serious crime.

I fell in love with someone who wasn't the right person for me, but you know what?

That, like life itself, is a learning experience.

I overcame my fear that I wouldn't be able to do any better and embraced life. L-I-F-E, to quote "Harold and Maude", LIFE!

For the first time in my life, I stepped out of my comfort zone and took the necessary steps to get out of a very unhealthy situation.

It took every amount of courage that I had to leave and not look back. I did not just move out, I moved on.

So when I see someone telling me that I have "no self-esteem" and feels the need to leave me a comment saying things like I think it's completely ironic that you tell other women to have esteem when you don't have ONE OUNCE of self respect for yourself. You don't have one ounce of self esteem and I'm sorry if it hurts but it's true. when they have no idea of what my life has been like, I am not only hurt, I'm also angry. My grandmother always told me that you can't judge a person until you've walked a mile in their shoes. have tried very hard to do that as I've grown up.

And yes, my self-esteem isn't as good as it could be. I won't deny that. But I am living my life honestly, and I won't apologize to anyone for that.

If I were to die tonight, I would die happy. I have a job that I love, friends who love me, a supportive and understanding family - when it comes to the important things, mind you - and a wonderful support network both online and off.

So back to the beginning. The things that we regret the most are the risks that we don't take. And if things don't end up the way that you want them to, you pick yourself up, you dust yourself off, and you start all over again. I am not going to look back at the age of 40 with nothing, I am going to look back and be proud of myself for leaving Mike and for at least taking a CHANCE to get the things out of life that I have always wanted. If I'm not able to achieve them, that's fine.

But at least I will know that I tried.

I'm finding out how hot
An old flame can burn
You're a feeling I haven't forgot
The love I can't unlearn
You've become a memory
I can't live without
You'll always be a fire I can't put out

I don't know how to handle
The dream you left behind
It's like a lighted candle
Burning up my mind
At least I'm happy knowing
What love is all about
You'll always be a fire I can't put out

Embers to ashes
That's how it should be
You'd think by know my heart would know
And it could set you free
The things I've tried
The tears I've cried
I guess there's no doubt
You'll always be a fire I can't put out

I don't know how to handle
The dream you left behind
It's like a lighted candle
Burning up my mind
At least I'm happy knowing
What love is all about
You'll always be a fire I can't put out
You'll always be a fire I can't put out

Today was a lovely day.

We decided to walk down to Riverfront Park, which was nice. There is this huge fountain right there in front of the park now, which a lot of little kids were playing and splashing around in. And of course, being nothing more than an overgrown little kid myself, I couldn't miss the opportunity to splash around in it. My overalls were soaked, but it was refreshing and very nice.

So, we walked through the park - saw the suction goat, the Falls, went for a ride on the gondola, had lunch at Benjamin's, and took plenty of photos. And it was a beautiful day, but hot. The respite we got was from splashing around in the water...yay!

So, right now "Little House On The Prairie" is on, and before too long, we're heading out again to (hopefully) visit with my Grandpa Schmidt and maybe Aunt Debbie and Adam, then my friend Lorraine later on, before we meet up with Ami's for Fudge Ana's at Frankie Doodle's.

Also, we're thinking about maybe a trip to Seattle on Saturday (maybe), so are there any Seattle locals who may be interested in buying us meeting us for lunch while we're there, that would be fun. So comment and let us know, we'll work out plans from there.

Hearing a thunderstorm startng up over the TV, so I'm going to get off of here so I don't fry it, and go run around town with my Redheaded Viking.

Later, all!

♥
Corrie

Sour Cream Rhubarb Squares

* 1/2 cup white sugar
* 1 tablespoon butter
* 1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
* 1 egg
* 1 teaspoon baking soda
* 1 cup sour cream
* 1/2 cup chopped walnuts
* 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
* 1/2 cup shortening
* 2 cups all-purpose flour
* 1/2 teaspoon salt
* 1 1/2 cups chopped rhubarb

DIRECTIONS:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease and flour 13 x 9 x 2 inch pan.
2. Mix sugar, nuts, melted butter and cinnamon until crumbly and set aside.
3. In a separate bowl, cream together brown sugar, shortening and egg.
4. Add flour, soda and salt to creamed mixture alternately with sour cream. Lastly, stir in rhubarb.
5. Pour mixture into pan and sprinkle with reserved topping.
6. Bake at 350 degrees F for 45 to 50 minutes. Cut in squares and serve warm or cool.

I used raw sugar because I prefer the flavor, and butter instead of shortening. Since I didn't have any nuts for the streusel, I left them out. And let me say that this is DELICIOUS...especially warm out of the oven with a cold glass of milk. It's more like a cake than a square, and would be lovely for a Sunday breakfast. Seriously, if you have an overabundance of rhubarb, make these and you won't regret it.

Yum....

I'm making sour cream rhubarb cake.

Anyone want to come over later and bring ice cream?

:-)

Such a feelins comin over me

There is wonder in most everything I see

Not a cloud in the sky

Got the sun in my eyes

And I wont be surprised if its a dream


Everything I want the world to be

Is now coming true especially for me

And the reason is clear

Its because you are here

Youre the nearest thing to heaven that Ive seen


(*) Im on the top of the world lookin down on creation

And the only explanation I can find

Is the love that Ive found ever since youve been around

Your loves put me at the top of the world


Something in the wind has learned my name

And its tellin me that things are not the same

In the leaves on the trees and the touch of the breeze

Theres a pleasin sense of happiness for me


There is only one wish on my mind

When this day is through I hope that I will find

That tomorrow will be just the same for you and me

All I need will be mine if you are here

The wind is kicking up a little today...I was wondering if it was going to storm or not earlier, but the sky is now blue as opposed to grey, so I'm not betting on it.

Poor Chan...I talked to him earlier, and this coming Monday is going to be insane. He's taking his dad to the doctor for a colonscopy, working from one until nine, and then going to try to get a few hours of sleep before leaving for the airport. He said he generally can't sleep on a plane, but after that crazy day he might be tired enough that it won't matter. Awwww.

I need to walk to the bank today with my change and see if I can get some quarters back so that I can do laundry, which is something else that desperately needs to be done. Laundry has a tendency to pile up...we all know how that can happen.

Also, I got a message from my brother on MySpace - I was hoping that he'd be able to possibly make it home this next week sometime to meet up with Chan, but he told me that he's got finals and is just too busy. I'm kind of disappointed, because I was really hoping that the two of them would get to meet. *sigh*

My damn sink is leaking, and SNAP still hasn't come to fix it. I've called twice...guess today makes three times. I have a container under the sink filling up with foul smelling sludge...if I dump it down the drain, I'm back where I started! grrrr. When I called a couple of weeks ago, the guy told me he'd have someone out to do it as soon as possible because of damage. Well, apparently as soon as possible is not that soon at all. And if the guy who fixed it two months ago hadn't done such a half-ass job on it in the first place, I wouldn't be in this quandry to begin with.

My parents come back from Hawaii tomorrow night.

I'm jittery, nervous, and worried...there's so much going on right now and maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I'm afraid that somehow, something is going to go wrong. *knock on wood*

Every time I hear "You Don't Have To Say You Love Me", I want to belt it out.

Unfortunately, excess noise after 10 PM isn't permitted here.

Blast. How can I really rock out by singing in a stage whisper along with Dusty?!

Special love for dead_gurlie

This is Chan posting for Corrie....

Her Computer harddrive has crashed so she has no access to her journal right now and she has used up all her voice posts.. so she can not post and might not be able to post in the near future unless it is through me.. I think she is going stir crazy without the computer.. Special hellos to Glenn and Alina.... Hopefully I will be back soon.. Chan is Checking my email.. so please leave comments..

Love
Corrie..